2nd November 2016
It’s been so nice to hear from a number of you
following my last blog on being bipolar. I understand just how important it is
to network with people who aren’t health professionals when you’re not in a
good place (because, as lovely as they can be, they’re not going to be able to
catch up over a coffee every time something shitty happens – that’s why we have
friends). Having said this, I’m neither a psychiatrist nor a psychologist (or a
general practitioner, or a paediatrician, or a dentist, or a gynaecologist, or
anything that requires a form of science degree – I dropped out of general
maths in year twelve because it was too hard).
I say that because a few of you have been asking me
“How do I know if I’m bipolar?” And I
haven’t been able to tell you, because I’ve only just been diagnosed myself. It
did get me to thinking though that there are plenty of mental health awareness
campaigns going around, and very few practical solutions on offer. I mean, it’s
all very well and good to share “RUOK” posts on Instagram, and post Facebook
statuses about Mental Health Month, and write blogs about our problems: but what
the fuck are you supposed to do when you come to terms with the fact that you
need proper help?
Again, I’m not a doctor or anything fancy; but
these are some things that I’ve personally found to be quite useful in coping
with yucky brain stuff, and some other things that may help you to get the
correct diagnosis.
Tip
Number One: List Your Symptoms
For me, this has been the most useful tool because
whenever I’ve found myself in an intimidating office or an emergency room with
some stranger probing and prying, I forget everything. What’s more, is I find
myself questioning why I’m there at all; and I dismiss my problems altogether.
I think that I’m wasting their time and that “it’s all in my head” (which is
funny, because it is their job and it actually is in my head).
So write everything down, even if you think it’s
not important. Write down the things you feel in your body; like a racing
heartbeat, sweaty palms, headaches, stomachaches, la di dah. And add to the
list what you were doing. Does it happen when you’re driving? When you get into
an argument? When you wake up? When you smoke a cone? When you’re eating a
piece of chocolate cake? Even if the series of events doesn’t make logical
sense, it’s good to get to know the ins and outs of your mind and body.
It can be hard to put your feelings into words, but
try it out anyway. Write them however they come out at the time and try not to
judge yourself. It might even clear a few things up for you. Like, I know now
that I can’t drink caffeine or alcohol (tragedy) otherwise my brain’s all like
“Meg, are you sure you want to exist today?”
Tip
Number Two: Have a Safety Plan
When you’re feeling pretty okay, come up with a
plan for what to do when you’re not pretty okay. A crisis can be anything for
anyone. It might be a panic attack; it could be impulsiveness; or paranoia; or
feeling like you want to off yourself. Basically any feeling that makes you
uncomfortable and unsafe.
Have a list of contacts for when these situations
arise. Who can you call that will be empathetic and helpful? You don’t want
somebody who will undermine your struggle (they can fuck off). Let them know
that you’re having difficulty being alive at that moment in particular, and let
them know in advance what you would like for them to do should the emergency come
up. You might just want them to be with you, you might want a hug; you might
want to talk to them, or for them to talk to you. You might want them to
suggest you having a shower, or that you eat a peanut butter sandwich, even a
reminder to breathe. It’s basically whatever will comfort you.
If you feel like you’ve handled the emergency (congratulations!)
and you’re able to have a nap, or watch TV, or read a nice book, eat some
chocolate and drink some tea; then do that. Because crises are exhausting.
If there isn’t anyone you can talk to, or if you
still feel on edge and at risk of yourself; then you can call one of these helplines:
Lifeline: 13 11 14
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 46 36
Suicide Call Back Service: 1300 659 467
Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800
MensLine Australia: 1300 78 99 78
Headspace: 1800 650 890
Mental Health Online also has some state specific
contact details.
The person on the other end may refer you to your
closest emergency department if they feel that you are incapable of keeping
yourself safe. They may also refer you to your community mental health team for
future treatment.
If you are desperate, do not hesitate to call 000.
You don’t even have to wait for somebody else to calm you down. Call them right
away if you need to. An ambulance will soon be there.
Tip
Number Three: Find Some Professionals
This is a huge step for anybody. I’ve been
surrounded by health people my entire life, but I remember when my Mum first told
me to make my own doctor’s appointment. I’d honestly forgotten how to use a
telephone. I know it’s scary, but you can do it. If you don’t want to go alone,
ask a friend to come along to hold your hand and stroke your hair. If you want
to go alone, plan something nice for yourself afterwards. Like eating your
favourite dinner, or taking bubble bath, or having a tea party with your sock
puppets.
Once you’ve made your appointment, take along your
list of symptoms, and ask for a referral to a psychologist and/or psychiatrist.
Doc may give you some fliers about some cost friendly public mental health
facilities and groups that may be of use to you (Headspace is a good one); or,
if you can afford it, some referrals to some private people. If the
professionals aren’t so professional, or you feel as though you need a second
opinion: then go and get a second opinion. You’d get a second opinion on a
dress you’re wearing, so why wouldn’t you get a second opinion on your brain?
Tip
Number Four: Also
Once you’ve got your doctors and psych’s and
medicines (if necessary) sorted out: take time to learn to love yourself again.
Do a little soul searching to understand your own beliefs, morals, self worth,
wants, needs, goals, and favourite kind of ice cream. Find an exercise that
gets your endorphins going, eat deliciously healthy food for all of the good
gut bacteria, and hug more people (if you don’t like hugging people, then hug
yourself). Just be try to be nice to yourself, really, because you’re a really
likeable kind of person.